Sunday, 24 January 2016
TAKING THE PISS!
You can always tell when a country has gone to the dogs. One sign is when it can't provide public conveniences for its citizens to use. The people who make these decisions to close public toilets, really ought to be strung up at the nearest lamp post or put in the dock.
In Tameside, Greater Manchester, I doubt there is a public toilet that is open at any time during the evening. Yet, despite this paucity of public urinals (which most Victorian's would have rightly considered scandalous), PCSO's can be seen on many an evening prowling the streets of Tameside in search of people pissing in the street in order to levy a fixed penalty notice -their 'urination tax'. Talk about taking the piss! Such filthy-lucre! What a way to make a living! Evidently, urinating in the streets of Tameside, is considered to be "Rowdy and Inconsiderate Behaviour", but not providing toilets, isn't considered an inconvenience to anyone.
The town of Stalybridge, which is twinned with Armentiers, in northern France, had one public toilet until it was closed by the big shots on Tameside Council (the cauliflower trust) after a cost cutting exercise. Years ago, this little cotton town, had around six public conveniences. After the toilet closed, it was suggested that it might be more convenient to twin the town with Clochemerle or two-loo's.
In South Lanarkshire, Jackie Burns, the council deputy leader, was spotted peeing in Hamilton town centre one Saturday evening after a night out on the town. He was nicked and issued with a £40 fixed penaly notice by the police. The incident came just months after this very same Labour councillor, oversaw the closure of public toilets in his council area. Burns told his ward residents that it was all the fault of the Scottish government who were to blame for toilet closures. Some might call this a piss poor excuse.
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A year or two ago, I did nominate Rochdale Council's new £50 million (plus interest) municipal offices for an award given out by the British Toilet Association (BTA).
Talk about over-egging an omelet. The new council offices has 90 self-contained toilets (wash basin/dryer etc)on the upper floors for staff use only. Enough to cope with a visiting Welsh male voice choir or any sudden outbreak of gastroenteritis. I cannot confirm whether the CEO's is gold-plated or just highly polished, Chinese brass.
However, the plebeians have to make do with just two on the ground floor (unlocked especially for you on request). I suppose members of the public with a stout constitution, can always chance it and use the street located 'tardis' type, pay-as-you-go ones, that probably wouldn't be allowed in Strangeways as being a cruel and unusual punishment.
Come to Rochdale town centre- as long as you have a bladder the size of a beach ball.
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