Friday, 22 January 2016

Mr. Dale's Diary

EXTRACTS from a diary that have been sent to Northern Voices.  This is the tenth extract.
This is the diary of a man of our times. 
Any resemblance to anyone living is, of course, purely coincidental.

Friday 22nd January 2016

Bit annoyed with my team missing a trick. When I got a Mr. Whippy they did not think to get a receipt. Slack. I am giving the impression of acting like a regular sort, concern for the residents and all that crap. My man cribbed a load of existing bits and pieces and put it on that Internet as another man of the people article. Earnings? £0.00. Shocking. My man said my publicity needed to change. Why? They will not get rid of me.
On the subject of receipts, do you know that some plebs object to a man of my station being paid to travel first class? Can you believe that? My elite status has been well earned. I’ve put my back out servicing people, therefore I need the comfiest of seats to continue my work for me. No gratitude some people.
My little helpers need to do a bit more. They forget that they will have real problems if I do not retain my position. I know a lot about them! I am the lynch pin, the dogs bollocks. Glad my ex is going away, she really is a publicity seeker, not like me. Feeling the pinch already, I need to get back to the arcticles the press put my name to. Feeling the pressure, need to speak to my mate Charlie, known him for years, a real friend in times of need.
Weekend coming up. Plenty of free feeds, especially the charity dos. Bit lost for a good female friend can you believe, but there is still the old flame I took on. Should get a spanking good curry thrown in as well!

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