Wednesday, 9 March 2016

Mr. Dale's Diary

EXTRACTS from a diary that have been sent to Northern Voices
This is the diary of a man of our times. 
Any resemblance to anyone living is, of course, purely coincidental.

Wednesday 9th March 2016

Had to duck down under the table (a place where I often find myself) to avoid talking to my visitor. I think he's gone, but just in case I'll use the back door when I go out. Keep seeing my ex about, if she's earning I should be able to get away with giving her less pennies. Can't see that she would put herself about for free; been well trained there!
 There has been something on the radio about woman's day.
Does that mean that the ladies will be looking for a pleasant day. My good self is available as always, my body toned as to near perfection. Even I can improve my handsomeness, but only by a small amount.
Time for my man to earn his corn by putting tales of my hard work before my adoring worshippers. I need to get more credit for some of the boring and tedious things I have had to do lately. Perhaps I need a 'double' for that sort of work. However there is only one of ME, there really is no one else like ME!
My man is always trying to give me advice. However he has been making some strange suggestions of late. He suggested getting a new suit with an arrow pattern saying it would be very fetching and that I shouldn't lag behind the times.
I always thought an alternative career for me could have been that of a male model. Perhaps I can get sponsorship from a bespoke gentleman's tailor. My fine athletic physique would be ideal to show off expensive attire. It would save having to put my fine clothes on my expenses; that account seems to be groaning under excess weight just at the moment.


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