Boris Johnson head-hunted by the Daily Vomit!

 

Boris Johnson

Boris Johnson always said he'd taken a pay cut when he became Prime Minister. Although he spent a mere 10 hours a month working on his weekly opinion piece for the Daily Telegraph, who paid him the staggering sum of £275,000, he described this as "chicken feed." 

With an expensive divorce settlement and multiple children to support, philandering Boris needs to bring in the spondoolies to keep Carrie happy. He's now being lined up for a job with the Daily Vomit, otherwise known as the Daily Mail. The newspaper, which sees itself as the epitome of probity, is campaigning to have the Parliamentary inquiry into Boris Johnson dropped. The inquiry is investigating whether Boris misled and lied to Parliament over 'Partygate'. 

It's also rumoured that Boris is about to nominate former Daily Mail editor, Paul Dacre, for a peerage. He's already put his former Daily Telegraph boss, Charles Moore into the House of Lords, along with his younger brother, Jo Johnson and many of his friends. Boris had already tried to shoe-in Dacre, into the top job at Ofcom, but that went down like a lead balloon, so a peerage is Dacre's consolation prize. It's also being rumoured that Boris is about to launch a new campaign called "White Lies Matter."